Tales From a Cougar

“Michael Dock, is that you?”


I looked around from my seat to see where the high soprano was coming from.  I wasn’t really trying to greet anyone, but there I was on a Saturday afternoon . . . . . waiting on the theater manager to return with my wallet that somehow fell out of my jeans while watching Black Panther the night before.  I had just finished conducting an in-service with my direct staff and was in desperate need of a beverage.  In order to get that drink, I needed my debit and credit cards that were in my wallet.  To say I was anxious was an understatement!  But as a familiar face emerged from the crowd, I was put at ease.  Lo and behold it was one of my former co-workers (whom we’ll call Gayle) who came and sat her happy self down right next to me!


“Girl, don’t come over here starting no trouble!  I don’t need one of your men thinking that something is up between you and me!”

“Won’t be no trouble today!  I’m just here to drop off my son and his friends to see Peter Rabbit”


“Peter Rabbit?  Really?”


After we discussed better movie options and my purpose for being there, we migrated to the subject that everyone (for some odd reason) wants to talk about: relationships.  More specifically, who I was dating now. . . . .


“So who has you under lock and key these days?  It’s been forever since I’ve seen you!”


“Well work keeps me pretty busy along with my son and the writing thing.  If I go out, it’s normally not around here.  I’m trying to keep my job!”


“I understand that.  You still in the church?  Somebody said that you stopped going to church all together?”


“Nah, I haven’t turned away just yet!  I still go when I’m on schedule.  Now you on the other hand . . . . . .”


“Well Michael, you know my situation . . . .you know why I can’t go back”


I nodded my head in agreement.  Word around town was that Gayle’s divorce was a messy one.  Even though both parties cheated, her ex-husband made his friends and congregation believe that it was only her.  He even went so far as to say that she was on drugs and hooking for money.  All the allegations forced Gayle into hiding while Reverend No Good pretended that they were still married nearly a year after the papers were signed.  Once he made it known to the congregation that he was a bachelor, it wasn’t half a year before he was married again (and that was nearly five years ago!)  I could detect that the issue was a sore one, so I didn’t dig into the matter.  Instead, I wanted to know what was going good in her world.


“So what have you been doing with yourself?  What lucky man has your attention these days?”


She smiled at me with those dreamy, reminiscent eyes.  Just as she was about to spill the tea, a youthful manager came over with my wallet.  I was so excited to see my plastic money that I treated my old friend to a cocktail inside the lounge.


“So you were about to tell me about this new guy you met.  He must be all that!  I can see the joy all over your face!  Do I know this guy?”


“I don’t think so Michael.  He’s a model”


“Ummmm . . . . so what does that mean?  I can be a model too!”


She laughed a little too much for my taste.


“Alright Ms. Gayle.  You don’t have to laugh that damn hard!”


“I’m sorry Michael.  I don’t think you know him.  He lives in North Carolina”


“So he lives in North Carolina.  What’s his name?”


“Trenton.  Trenton Abernathy”


“Trenton Abernathy?”


“Yes.  I came to know this tall drink of water through my Instagram account.  I started posting some of my workouts and saw that he started liking the posts.  I really didn’t pay it any mind because . . . it’s Instagram!  You want people to like your site right?  Anyhew, I did a live thing where I was talking about nutrition and exercise and he chimed in.  I acknowledged him and he commented on the feed several times.  After the broadcast, he was in my DM talking about how fabulous I looked”


“Brother was shooting his shot I see?”


“What’s funny about the whole thing is that I didn’t know he was hitting on me!  It was only until he asked for my number that I caught on!  Just as soon as I gave him the digits, he called and we talked for hours!  Michael, we started at seven that night and didn’t get off the phone until three the next morning!”


“See?! I knew you were a talker!  Probably talked that poor brother to death!”


“Well he enjoyed me talking, thank you very much!  It wasn’t a week before he arranged our first date.  He had heard a lot about SkyView Atlanta and wanted to take me there.  But when I opened the door and saw him looking like some good god almighty, our plans changed!”


“So you gave up the cookie the first time you saw him?”


“I didn’t expect him to look so damn fine!  He greeted me with flowers and a kiss that made me feel twenty-one again!”


“Damn! It was like that huh?”


“Michael, that man smelt so good!  I think he had that Creed Aventus on!  Did I mention he was fine?  Jesus!”


“So what happened?”


“He continued to kiss me while he let his hands run up my dress.  Next thing I know, we’re going at it, from the couch, to the kitchen counter, on the living room floor, and finally in the bedroom!  He kissed me in places I didn’t even know were sensual!  Like the brother kissed my knees and sucked my toes!”


“Wait a minute?  Kissed your knees?  Those ashy ass things?”


“Shut up Michael!  Are you gonna let me tell my story or not?”


I started back on my drink and nodded for Gayle to continue.


“So anyway, Trenton was turning me all the way on before he even licked my spot!  When I tell you I came so hard for him!”


“Ummmm, TMI baby girl!  I’m still a guy remember?”


“Michael, that heavenly goodness blessed my soul that weekend!  He was supposed to leave the next morning.  He didn’t end up leaving until Tuesday night!”


“Tuesday night?  You had to pay extra for your mom to keep the kids didn’t you?”


“Yes I did . . . and it was well worth it!  Brother was blowing my back out every weekend after that”


“So why isn’t he here with you now?”


Her demeanor quickly changed as she took a rather long sip of her margarita.


“The last weekend we spent together, I made the mistake of leaving my iPad out on the coffee table while I took a shower. . . . “


“Uh oh . . . . I know where this is going”


“Yeah, an “acquaintance” started hitting my DM asking if he could come over.  Old boy sent a pic of his dick hanging out of his shorts saying come and get it”


“Oh no!”


“On top of that, my ex-husband tried to video message me.  When I didn’t respond, he sent me a message saying that he wanted to work things out”


“All while you were in the shower?”


“Yes!!  I’m so glad Trenton couldn’t see that picture!”


“So what happened when you got out the shower?”


“He confronted me about it”


“And . . .”


“And I told him that I had a life prior to him coming into my DM”


“So did he ask you to stop seeing the old acquaintance?”


“No, he didn’t ask me to stop, but he did ask me who else was I sleeping with besides him”


“Please tell me you lied!  Lord, please tell me you lied!”


“No need to lie.  I’m a grown woman!  I told him there were two other men I had been seeing, but there was nothing serious there”


“Damn Gayle . . .”


“I got the feeling that he thought I shouldn’t have been entertaining anyone while he was taking care of my needs.  Although we went out later that evening, he refrained from having sex with me.  He even left that Sunday morning instead of that evening, saying that he had an early shoot Monday and needed to get back”


“Have you talked to him since?”


“Somewhat, but the conversation is not the same.  He’s very short with me and only answers the questions I pose instead of us having serious, life conversations.  He’s been giving me excuse after excuse for not seeing me anymore”


“Wow . . .”  


“And I really like Trenton, Mike.  He reminds me of what it feels like to be in love before I built my walls up.  I hate to say it, but Trenton is the best lover I’ve ever had”


“The best? Ever?”


“Before Trenton, it was hard for me to achieve an orgasm through oral sex.  Buddy changed the entire game for me!  He actually wore me out to the point of exhaustion!  Guess that’s what I get for messing around with a twenty-six year old”


“Say what?”


“Yeah . . . . I know . . . . I’m too old for him”


“Says who?  Honestly Gayle, if he made you that happy and was willing to drive over three hours every weekend to see you, why would age matter?”


“Michael, you know those relationships don’t last!”


“Now who told you that?  Don’t miss your happy because of what you believe others might say!  You’re stunning for your age!  Don’t you say you have those young pups at the gym constantly trying to get with you?”


“Yeah but he was a little too good to be true.  I’m sure buddy is probably bi-sexual or something”


“Why does he have to be bi Gayle?  Just because he’s something you haven’t experienced before?  Look, don’t be like me.  I was in your shoes once.  I dated this young philly who could have won any beauty pageant!  She went out of her way to make me feel like I was her everything even though I felt I could lose her to a young thundercat at any time. Despite our eleven year age difference, we had quite a bit in common.  She was becoming my best friend.  But because I’ve been in dysfunctional relationships for half of my life, I thought she was like the rest.  I kept other women around even though I told her she was the only one. Imagine what happened when I sent a text to Ms. Perfect that was meant for Ms. Right Now?”


“Oh wow. . .”


“Yeah. Now I have to watch her get married to another guy next month”


“I’m so sorry Michael”


“Don’t be sorry for me.  Be better than me.  Go pay him a visit”


“I don’t know Michael.  I really don’t know if I’m ready for someone like him . . . .”


“Did you not just hear what I said?  Are you going to be sitting next to me at some bar as Mr. Perfect marries someone else?  Don’t let your age detour you.  And most definitely don’t let your insecurities hold you back!  You deserve the best. . . . .”


Gayle nodded as she took the final sip of her drink.  I could see that even after the encouragement, she was still torn.  I motioned to the bartender to give her another bracer, but she declined and took her leave.  I sat there with my refill and thought about how many young women I dismissed because I didn’t feel I would measure up.  Has there ever been a time when you decided not to pursue someone younger than you because you didn’t want to embarrass yourself?  Is age really more than a number?



Written by the Wednesday Gentleman

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