“Didn’t he tell you? I’m his ex-wife . . . . .”
All my fears were confirmed as she pronounced her affiliation. The way that she stood there . . . all naked and shit, let me know that this wasn’t her first time. A part of me wanted to grab her by the pony tail and interrogate the bitch. But instead of yielding to my emotions, I simply said . . .
“No . . . . .”
She wanted to start a conversation but this wasn’t the time. It was too early in the morning and I was afraid that I was going to drag Ms. Perky’s ass downstairs to James and demand an explanation. Then there would have been the assault charge on both of them and me . . . . . . losing yet another job. Instead of the theatrics, I briskly went out the way I came, climbing into the getaway car. . . . . .
“Chelsea . . . . . Chelsea . . . . . wake up girl! The girls will be up any minute!”
I could feel someone nudging my shoulder. Then suddenly . .
“What the hell?!”
“Girl, I’ve been trying to get your ass up for the past five minutes! Hurry up and go into the room before the girls see you!”
“Did you have to hit me on my ass though April?”
“Seeing that your whole ass is exposed right now, I would say yes! Boy, he must have really rocked your world last night!”
I reached down to see what she was talking about. Sure enough, I had left my panties at James house!
“Damn . . . . .”
“Enough with that! Hurry up and get to the bedroom before they wake up”
“Okay April. Do you mind getting them together and taking them to practice?”
“Sure girl, but you know I wanna hear what happened last night!”
I nodded my head and made the long trek to my bedroom. After several steps, I felt like I couldn’t make it. My legs were like jello! My stomach was tight as if I had trained for a decathlon! I held on to the wall as I surrendered to my bed.
As I laid there, my mind quickly took me back to last night. My hands began to touch my breast, which were still tender to the touch. Somehow, I could still feel James lips there, bathing them with his seductive tongue. I could still sense him penetrating me. I could hear him crying in my chest as he explored me slowly. And just like that, I felt myself letting go again . . . . . . Damn! It hadn’t even been twelve hours and I was already starving for more!
My heart continued to relive acts one and two but my mind laid out the evidence. My mind wouldn’t let me get past the fact that James didn’t inform me that other people resided in the home, let alone his ex-wife! As my legs relaxed again, I thought about that woman in the refrigerator. How perfect her breast were. How fit she was. Girl didn’t have an inch of fat on her! Like she was chiseled from stone or some shit! I started to wonder how James couldn’t make it work with her. After all she was perfect . . . and I . . . . was the anti-perfect. I continued to hear closing arguments as I rested my eyes one more time . . . . . .
*knock, knock, knock*
Before I could answer, the door flew open and closed in the same breath.
“Giirrrrlllllllll!!!!! You gotta tell me what happened to you last night!”
“Damn, April! It’s awful early in the morning to be asking all these questions!”
“Early? Girl it’s damn near three o’clock! He fucked you reeeeeeaaaaaaallllll good!”
I looked over at the clock and saw that April was not exaggerating.
“Wow . . . I’ve never slept this long! Damn . .”
“No you haven’t. The girls asked if you were okay? I told them that you had a sinus cold but you would be at their game tonight”
“Damn, I can’t believe I’ve slept this long!”
“Enough of the chit chat dammit! Get to the details! How long was he? Did he eat it the pudding right? How many times did you . . . . . ”
“I’m just saying . . . I mean . . . from the way that you were lying prostrate on that couch, I think buddy had the magic stick!”
“To be honest, James does . . . . . but I don’t think I’m going to see him anymore”
“You say what?!”
“I’m not going to see him anymore. Motherfucker lied to me!”
“But didn’t you just meet him?”
“No, we’ve been colleagues for several months now . . . . . ”
“So how did he lie to you Chelsea if you haven’t been talking?”
“Well . . . . we have been communicating via text and DM for a few weeks”
“Okay. . . and what have you all basically talked about?”
I thought about all the conversations that led up to last night’s main event. I couldn’t remember me asking any pertinent information about James outside of where he went to college and how he ended up at the Atlanta Regional Commission. He did tell me he was divorced and was in the midst of transitioning, but I never inquired as to what that was. I was flattered by the smoothness. I had fallen in love with the possibility of being next to him that I didn’t do my homework.
“We basically talked about me . . . .”
“So again girlfriend, how did he lie to you? I’m trying to understand all of this . . . . ”
“Well . . . . he didn’t. I guess I never asked the right questions. But how would you feel if the man of your dreams had his ex-wife living with him?”
“Man of your dreams?”
“After James gave me more orgasms than I could count, he tells me that I can spend the night right? So I’m like sure, lead me to the bedroom. He’s like “nah, nah, I’m living in the basement apartment”
“Wait a minute? Brother’s house is large enough where he has his own basement apartment?”
“Yes! So even though my spidey sense was all tingly and shit, I told him that I will spend the night. But I couldn’t sleep so I tried to leave quietly. So as I’m leaving, I run into this chick who is damn near naked in the refrigerator who says she’s his ex-wife!”
“Yes, she was all perky and shit . . . like one of those valley girls . . . I got out as quickly as I could!”
“Yeah, I could see that when I walked out to the car this morning. You all up in the yard! Like you didn’t even care that there was a driveway!”
“Don’t laugh at me April! What should I do now? I wanna see him again but the ex-wife . . . nude . . in a home that they are sharing? Why would a woman be so comfortable parading naked in a house that she shares with her ex?”
“Sounds like you made your decision to me. If it was just dick, you wouldn’t let old girl bother you as much right?”
“But what if I jumped to conclusions? You know I always do! I don’t want to be broken again! Maybe this was all just a big misunderstanding . . .”
“Oh my! That dick was good! Does he have a brother? Hell, I’ll take his ex-wife right now!”
“April, I’m serious!”
“If you’re serious, you can start by answering his calls. Here . . . .”
April handed me my purse which I probably left in the truck as well last night. I reached in and to my surprise, James had called and texted several times. He even sent a video via messenger telling me that he wanted to see me again and talk about last night. April, forever the instigator, was watching along with me.
“Damn he’s fine! Girl, if you don’t want him, I’ll take on him and his ex-wife!”
“I can’t with you April!”
“I’m just saying. Ain’t no shame here! A nut is a nut!”
April laughed as I ushered her out the door. I went back to my phone and looked at the video several more times. I was hypnotized by his eyes and lips. What if I was imagining the worse? I wanted to return his call but what would I say?
Written by The Wednesday Gentleman