After chopping it up at the black man’s country club aka the barbershop with my barber/friend yesterday, he and I came to the conclusion that sometimes the best thing to do for all parties that are involved in a conflict is to walk away. My barber was explaining to me how his previous business partnership failed and after the final straw he just walked away. After hearing his side of the story, I told him that he did the best thing for everybody.
Even though I only heard one side of the story, I’ve witnessed firsthand the disconnect between both my barber and his ex-partner. My barber is more business minded and has vision. He is not content with only being a barber. He really wanted the shop to not only succeed, but grow with the possibility of future opportunities. His ex-partner couldn’t see beyond being a barber, lacked vision and wasn’t good at running a business. You can see how problems between the both of them could arise.
How many times do we as people continue to stay in a situation that has run it’s course awhile ago? But yet we still stay and try to “will” it to work. Sometimes we lie to ourselves by thinking things will get better even though things haven’t been right for years. Or there is no other option. Whether it’s a business partnership or a relationship we try to convince ourselves to stay when we know we shouldn’t.
We use excuses like “I’ve invested to much time and energy to just to walk away”, or “Things will get better, I just have to be patient” and “who’s going to want me? I’m X years old.” Even though things can get better, they’ll only get better if the breaking point hasn’t been reached and if both parties are committed and willing to make the sacrifices needed.
But sticking around just because of time, money and energy already invested can only lead to more pain and resentment.
Even though situations don’t start out sour, they sometimes evolve or de-evolve over time into potential toxic and painful situations. If this happens, why would you want to continue investing in a situation that is negatively affecting you? Are the past good times really worth your current pain and aggravation? I know we sometimes place higher value on money and time than our own well being and feelings that we allow to make us slaves to our current predicament.
My barber has a passion for cutting hair and his previous business partner was a friend. He invested money into remodeling the shop and had plans on taking it to another plateau; where every cut and service would feel more like an experience than just a haircut. Though he stayed longer than he probably should have, he had the mindset to walk away now with minimal strain on the friendship rather than stay and possibly end up hating his friend. So while we can’t get back the things that we invest, walking away with your sanity intact along with your self worth is worth more.
I’m no business expert and have been known to walk away from situations that didn’t feel right. This may or not have been the best thing to do since I probably walked away from things without putting in the work and commitment to see if it would work out. Have you ever stayed in a situation that you knew deep down in your heart was past it’s expiration date? If so why? And how did it turn out?
Talk to me, I’ll talk back.