You’re A Customer

THANK GOD IT’S FRIDAY. My favorite rapper of all time, the G.O.A.T. and a fellow June Gemini, Ice Cube, made one of my favorite songs Friday; about the one day a week that everybody can’t wait for.

Why has customer service gotten so shitty!?!? Have you ever had service so bad you would rather have your teeth pulled? No? Well, I have. I’ve noticed something the last couple of years; customer service (especially if you go to black establishments or stores/restaurants in a black neighborhood) that customer service has fallen off a cliff.

Case in point: a couple of years ago Ms. Breazy, myself and a good friend of ours went out on a Saturday night, and let me tell you, this night turned into an adventure. First, we tried to go the strip club Bazz & Crue (off Marlboro Pike in Forestville, MD). Now if you know anything about that part of PG County – for my DMV people – then you know what I am about to say will come as no surprise that you needed a membership, proof of insurance, 4 types of ID and you had to know the secret knock and password just to get in the door ( I think the password for that month was reindeer). I walked in – not knowing a membership was needed – to ask how much the cover was and how much did lap/table top dances cost. The very manly looking female cashier looked me up and down, sized me up, and laughed, asking me “you aint know about the membership?” But didn’t bother to answer my question.

Had this been a white establishment, I believe not only would they have asked if I knew about the membership, they probably would have been happy to tell me about the different membership packages and probably asked me if I wanted to purchase one right then and there or even set up a payment plan. But no, that’s not what happened here. Rather than take this opportunity to gain new customers, this strip Club (Bazz & Crue off of Marlboro Pike in Forestville, MD) made me feel stupid and helpless for not knowing a membership was needed to the point that I felt about as stupid and helpless as Waka Flocka’s GED instructor. Well, what do you expect when you see someone who is probably a dancer, walk into the club wearing a SpongeBob square pants jacket and rolling a SpongeBob SquarePants suitcase?

So after strike one, we then decided to go Applebees (off of Donnell Dr. in Forestville, MD – again in PG county). What should have been an enjoyable evening spent getting tipsy off of the 85% alcohol, 15% mixed drinks and laughing at the high-octane ratchetness turned into me almost getting stabbed by Keisha – our bartender who had more facial metal than pinhead (seriously, she had 3 earrings in each ear, a tongue ring, a metal dimple and a stud under her lip) – because she forgot the first time around to put the salt on the rim of the glass of the margarita that I ordered.

All I did was ask Keisha for salt on the rim of my glass when our drinks were brought to our table. She sized me up and basically said “n*gga you need to take that shit to Georgetown or somewhere where they actually provide customer service” in the form of a half-assed “ok, I’ll get salt for you” while holding the pen like it was penitentiary steel.

Because I used to live in that area, I was aware of how “things are done.” I wasn’t expecting 5 star service, but I also wasn’t expecting to have to watch my back while fearing for my life over some damn salt. When I finally did get some salt on my glass, Keisha had the mug on mean as if I did something wrong, still holding that pen like she was going to shank me at the drop of a dime while wearing a fake smile looking like Peter Gunz (is it me or does Peter Gunz always look like he’s about to throw up). I didn’t know whether I should drink my margarita or strap phone books around my midsection with duct tape for protection.

But what do you expect from a bar where there are police officers on duty who walk by laughing at people leaving stumbling drunk to their cars possibly causing deathly accidents saying under their breaths drunk ass n*ggas?

After experiencing cavity inducing ratchetness and laughing at the Coogi, Pelle Pelle, Members Only jackets and mix match weaves we decided to call it a night with our lives still in tact. All in all if was a good night considering the horrible and life threating customer service.

So, have you ever experienced horrible service and if so how did you handle it?

I hope you all have a good Friday and a safe and fun weekend.

2 thoughts on “You’re A Customer

  1. Had a great weekend, hope you did too Breezy. Don’t get me started on AT&T. Folks can scream about cell phone companies but I never had as bad of service as I do with them. Unfortunately I have about a year left on my contract with a company that doesn’t provide me any more than 2 bars of signal in and around the most important city in the history of the world. They give the stock BS answer and offer to ‘boost the power of my phone’ or they are putting in a ‘service ticket’ to look into my problem. Don’t lie to me people, tell it like it is…your service sucks!!! Don’t claim to cover 97% of America and NOT cover DC.

    My problem is that I should be getting full signal without having to bitch about it. I live in DC!!! WTF? I guess if the bomb drops here then they figured I wouldn’t have time to call my family so why bother helping? It doesn’t compare to the strip club/Applebees story but AT&T burns my ass.

    When you mention ‘that’s how things are done’, it also counts for Guitar Center. Where you were worried about Keisha I am too. She must be the one woman that walks into the shit hole Guitar Center in Rockville, MD that takes every salesperson away from the counter and other customers. Several times I’ve been waiting in line or trying to track down some help and find 3-8 guys surrounding some chick in a tight skirt and fake rack. I emailed the store’s manager and he literally said there was little he could do. REALLY? As a working composer with a business account there, I can’t believe that customers are secondary in that way.

    Never really had any issues at bars or restaurants but I have seen customers blow up at waiters and waitresses for no reason. Customer service has been lost here but the sense of entitlement everyone has in the DMV has contributed to poor service. I wouldn’t want to put up with the spoiled folks here if I was serving their food and getting little to no tip. There’s definitely a 1% vs 99% vibe here.

    1. The weekend was good aside from digging holes on Saturday to plant plants. Other than that I can’t complain. I’ve witnessed the 1% vs 99% here in PG county and you wouldn’t believe who it is that acts that way. It’s normally the people that live from check to check or depend on the 1st and the 15th. I hate when I walk into a Target in District Heights or Largo around the 1st and the 15th, you can definetely tell who just got there county checks. Well like you said customer services has been declining for a long time now, what are you going to do about it?

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